Never Forget
by XxSparklesxXDiamondsxXRainbows
Summary: John and Moira appear to be getting their life together until tragedy strikes.However, not only is Moira a widow with three kids but shes also expecting a baby never to know its father. Freddie Barton is doted on by his family and seems to have it all but as he gets older he craves something more :Love, underatanding, home truths and getting to know his father.
1. Chapter 1

**hello peeps :)**

 **This is my first emmerdale fanfic so please be kind xxx**

Moira was nervous. John wanted to see her. She felt sick. They hadn't had a proper talk since Moiras affair with Cain Dingle had emerged. She loved John so much and felt awful and dirty. She hoped this encounter would be at least pleasant. She sat at the table, her palms sweaty and her stomach in knots. At last she heard the door go and she stood up.

"Moira." John said softly walking over to her, Moira looked up at him and swallowed,

"John."

They didn't speak to each other for a few moments, the atmosphere could be cut with a knife. Moira didn't know what to say. Then John spoke,

"I still love you."

Moira looked at him, her heart fluttering. She felt tears coming and swallowed them down, she went to speak but John placed a finger on her lips.

"I don't want us to split up. I love you too much to let you go. You and our family mean so much to me. I would die for you babes and I know that you would for me."

Moira looked into his eyes, tears running. John wiped them away and rested his forehead against hers. He held her in his arms as she cried.

"I'm so sorry darling. I never meant it to happen. That thug meant nothing to me, I swear. I don't even know why it happened. If I could reverse the clock I would. I love you, I love you so much." Moira cried and John held her, tears running down his handsome face. They held each other for a few moments.

Then they looked into each other's eyes, love enveloping them as John leaned in and kissed her. It was a tender and soft kiss and Moira kissed him back. Within seconds the kiss became more passionate and intense and Moira began undoing John's shirt throwing it on the floor. John smiled and did the same with Moira, they both giggled as moira ran her hands over John's chest and led him upstairs. There was no one in. Everyone was at the woolpack.

Moira pushed John onto the bed and shut the bedroom door as she undid his jeans, John could see Moiras cleavage and he felt the rise in his pants.

He hovered over her and took of her bottoms while Moira looked up at him, the love she had for him overpowering.

Within minutes, They were moaning and groaning in the bed as Moira held onto John, who thrusted in and out. They kissed passionately whilst moaning and after a while they climaxed together like they always did when they made love. John lay beside her and held her in his arms, Moira was smiling and bathing in after glow.

"Amazing." Was all Moira managed to say as she rested her head against John's chest. John kissed her head softly.

"It always is darling." He whispered as they settled down to sleep in each other's arms.

Neither one realized how brief their happiness would be.


	2. Chapter 2

Days went by and John and Moiras marriage was getting back on track and the kids were so happy that their parents were back together. So much so that they decided to organize a surprise for them: a spa weekend. They just had to find a time to tell them.

It was evening and John and Moira were alone in the house. Moira was feeling slightly unwell and John was concerned.

"Moira, are you ok?" He asked as she leant over the sink. She nodded and smiled weakly,

"Yeah babes, just feeling a bit sick that's all. I think that pie that Marlon did wasn't cooked properly." She said before rushing up the stairs holding her stomach. She made it just in time and threw up in the toilet, John followed her with a glass of water and rubbed her back.

"Come downstairs and have a cuddle." He whispered and he led her by the hand downstairs. Moira took deep breaths and lay her head on John's lap as he stroke her hair.

"NO more trauma for us. We're gonna be happy from now on. It's you and me always." He whispered as he ran his fingers through her hair. Moira looked up and smiled at him before leaning in for a kiss. She gently caressed his cheek and kissed him then she gently caressed his lips and whispered,

"Lets go upstairs."

John smiled but as they were about to head upstairs, the front door opened. Hannah, Holly and Adam came in with excited looks on their faces.

"Mum, Dad, we've got something for you." Hannah announced as she produced a leaflet from her inside pocket. John and Moira looked at their children and smiled, looking confused. Moira took the leaflet,

"It's a spa weekend for you and Dad." Adam announced with a grin on his face. Moira looked shocked as did John but they were both happy. Very happy.

A few days later they headed to the car. Just as they were about to leave, Moira headed back in the house,

"Just need to get something I'll be right back."

As she headed in the house, she headed straight in the bathroom and locked the door. Grabbing her bag, she pulled out a pregnancy test and took a deep breath. She and John weren't planning another baby but she believed that if she was pregnant then this would be the light at the end of the tunnel for them. Overcoming her nerves, she took another deep breath and did the test but didn't hang around for the result. Instead she put the test back in her bag and decided to wait till she got to the hotel before looking at it.

"Come on Mum,we ain't got all day!" Adam called as Moira got in the car. John smiled at her and she smiled back as he drove them away. Moira relaxed in the car seat and as she turned to look outside, she noticed her bag was open and the test was on top. As the outside street lamps reflected on the window, she widened her eyes.

The test was positive.

She was pregnant.


	3. Chapter 3

Moira felt her heart flutter with joy. The baby was definitely John's and she was delighted. It matched when she and John got back together. She decided to tell him when they got to the hotel. She hoped he would be happy. They had talked about having another child together but Moira thought it wouldn't happen at all. So much had happened since they moved to Butlers three years earlier.

"You alright babes?" John asked and Moira nodded with a smile.

"Yeah Darling I'm fine. Oh it's gonna be so great. Just me and you darling." She said smiling as John messed with the car radio.

"I know." John added with a smile admiring how beautiful his wife and how lucky he was to have her. They were more in love than ever before and it made him so happy.

After a while of reminiscing, Moira caught another glimpse of the test and hoped that this baby would bring them closer together and as "Fools gold" by the Stone roses, she wondered if this child that she was carrying would be welcomed by her other children who were never keen on the idea of another sibling.

Suddenly, her thoughts came to a Holt when the car skidded on black ice causing the car the topple over, Moira screamed as the car started rolling. John tried taking control but it was no good. Then suddenly everything stopped.

Moira awoke from unconsciousness to find the car rocking. John, whose faced was cut and blood was pouring, looked over and, to their horror, found that the car was on the edge of a cliff.

"Oh my God." Moira whispered, tears streaming. "What are we going to do?" She was terrified as was John who was clearly in pain and unable to move. Tears ran down his cheeks as he undid Moiras seatbelt.

"You need to get out. Stand on me." He said and Moira looked at him.

"I can't darling." She stammered and John grabbed her hand,

"If you don't well both plummet, now stand on me, it's the only way to get out."

Moira took a deep breath and crawled over to where John was then standing up, she stood on his legs, his cries of pain echoing in her ear as she fought desperately to get out, the car rocked once more and Moira screamed a little as she finally managed to get out. Help had been called and she rushed to John's side.

"Help is on the way baby. Well get you out of here." She whispered as she touched his cheek, seeing how weak he was becoming was heart breaking. John swallowed before saying suddenly,

"I love you."

And then...The car fell off the cliff and Moira watched horrified. She was in shock at what she had just seen and when the paramedics rushed over, she was an emotional wreck.

Sometime later, Hannah, Holly and Adam, who had heard about the crash rushed to be at their mothers side. Moira was distressed and they were powerless to comfort her but did their best just the same. Moira had needed a check up due to her pregnancy and she was fearing for not only his life but her babies too. Finally a doctor arrived,

"Mrs Barton, I have the results of your examination. I'm pleased to see all is well and the baby appears to be fine also." He announced as he read what was on his clipboard. The kids looked confused,

"What do you mean, pregnant?" Adam asked, clearly not registering what had been said. The doctor looked at him,

"Upon arrival, we examined Mrs Barton and she is pregnant. A few days to say the least but everything appears to be fine. Now Mr Barton has had major surgery to relive the bleeding however in cases such as this, the situation can change very quickly."

His voice sounded solemn as he said this and Moira felt deflated an put her hand to her stomach, which didn't get have a bump but would do soon. Was her baby about to loose its father?

"Then I want to see him." She said and they were all lead to the room where John lay.

The Bartons spent a while chatting to John who was lying in a hospital bed looking helpless and so vulnerable and fragile, it made their hearts sink. They tried to make the situation more bright by making jokes about Andy's car which was badly damaged and the fact that they made need a pay rise after all that. After a while, the kids left Moira with John, still shocked at the knowledge that one day there would be a fourth edition to the family.

I don't know why what happened happened. It wasn't flattery. I was being selfish while you were out there working hard for all of us like you always have. And now look at you, lying here so helpless. Oh look at what I've done to you, my beautiful John." Moira sobbed as she kissed his hand repeatedly. John took a deep breath and said weakly,

"Doesn't matter. Can I ask you something?" He asked and Moira nodded,

"Do you love me?"

Moira smiled and nodded.

"Yes I love you. So much." She gushed. John looked at her then tapped his chest and and reached over and placed his hand on her chest, telling her in his own way he loved her.

"A few hours of your life. Me and you. Twenty two years. What a team." He said softly and managed a smile while Moira smiled back,

"Yeah what a team. But twenty two years that's nothing. Your stuck with me for another fifty. Think you can handle that big man?" She asked grinning stroking his cheek. John smiled,

"Be nice." He said and Moira held his hand. Then taking a deep breath, she said,

"And John...soon it won't be three kids we have. Well soon have a fourth. I'm pregnant. Only a few days. It's definitely yours. I was going to tell you at the hotel but with what's happened."

John looked at her for a moment then he lifted his arm and put his hand on Moiras stomach.

"A baby in our old age. He'll look after us." He said weakly and Moira looked at him raising an eyebrow,

"He? Maybe a she darling" she said with a grin. John managed a laugh,

"I have a feeling we will have a boy this time but either way it will be loved and cherished more than anything in the world" He mumbled. Moira smiled then she rested her head on his chest.

"Oh I love you John." She whispered and a tear ran down John's face, delighted that he was gonna be a father again.

Then the heart monitor started beeping and John was unconscious once more. Moira was dragged out of the room, hysterical as Adam held her close. All of them watched as the nurses and Doctors worked on John trying to save his life. Moira was in bits as she watched her husband lying lifeless in the bed. This couldn't be happening. She was about to loose the man she had loved nearly all her life. She felt her heart breaking and she couldn't fix or help her husband who was lying with a tube in his mouth and people working on him trying to save his life.

"I think we should stop. Time of death twenty three eighteen." The Doctor announced and Moira and the kids were beside themselves.

"NO don't stop please no!" Moira yelled through her tears as she sank backwards into Adams arms, sobbing hysterically. The love of her life was gone. And her unborn baby would never know it's father. She collapsed, her heart broken in two.

She felt her life had ended.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello Chapter Four guys. How will The Bartons cope without John? Find out here xxx**

Silence. Moira awoke. Grief enveloping her as she reached over the other side of the bed. She sat up and the enormity of what happened washed over her like a waterfall. Her beloved John. The man she had been married for over twenty years had gone and he was never coming back. Tears stung her eyes as she sat there and put her hand over her stomach, the baby that she was supposed to have with John, the child that would have been doted on by him but now was never going to know him. It broke her heart as she sank back against the pillows and sobbed.

Cain was in the woolpack sitting by himself. News of John's death had just reached him and he didn't know what to feel. Mixed emotions were going through his head as he drank his pint then Andy came in, tears down his face. Cain looked up,

"He's dead. I already know. It was the paper This morning. Hey, don't bloody cry for God's sake. He don't want none of your tears." Cain said abruptly. Andy wiped his tears and nodded,

"Yeah he's dead." Andy mumbled and Cain nodded then taking a deep breath he added,

"How did he die?"

Andy sighed and spoke sadly,

"He died with a smile on his face, knowing he was gonna be a dad again. Moira told me all this. May he rest in peace now." Andy added with a cry. Cain scoffed,

"May he burn in hell! He gave me nothing but grief, that bloke! Let's hope this kid when it comes doesn't turn out like him. I've had enough with the three he already produced."

Andy, shocked by how disrespectful Cain was, walked out. He needed to see Moira.

Moira had just dressed and got up when Andy arrived. Both were clearly in mourning and that was evident.

"Hello Moira." He said and Moira nodded.

"Hello Andy, how are you?" She asked.

"I am very sorry about John. I just can't believe it. I was only speaking to him last week. He was so happy. Oh, I heard that your pregnant."

"Yeah I am. I was Happy too. Oh and before you say anything it's John's baby. I am only a few days." Andy nodded as if he knew that she wasn't lying.

"I know. I put Cain straight." Andy added and sighed heavily before adding,

"Listen I know it's a bad time but the car..."

Moira nodded.

"I know I'll pay for any damage..." She had begun to say but was cut off with Andy crying,

"I feel I've lost a brother." He sobbed as they embraced, grieving together.

Adam and Aaron were in the barn. Adam was stricken with grief and it was devastating to see. Aaron was comforting him, equally sad. Although there had been times when he and John had clashed, they did get on well and he was a nice bloke and a brilliant father, a better father than his own father.

"Mums having a baby and it will never Dad. How are we going to tell it when it's older that it doesn't have a dad? How can I bear that?" Adam cried and Aaron Sat with him,

"Shower it with love. Tell it about him when it's older." Aaron patted Adam on the back and added,

"It will get better. I promise."

Aaron had had his fair share of grief having recently lost his boyfriend Jackson to assisted suicide. Adam was there for him then so he was gonna be there for him now.

After speaking with Chas and Diane, Moira had taken to bed early so she could think about John. The years she had spent with him had been the happiest she had ever been and now he was gone, she didn't know what to do. She hoped that baby was like John, had his looks, his charisma, his complex and warm hearted personality. It would be perfect if it did.

The day after, Moira decided to visit John in the chapel of rest. Holly, Hannah and Adam had already visited and all had become emotional wrecks after doing so. Moira didn't care if she ended up sobbing, she just wanted to see him.

The undertaker lead her to a dimly lit room where John was lying. Moira walked over and gasped when she saw him.

He looked perfect. Like he was sleeping. She could see the marks on his handsome face and chocked back tears as looked at him. He looked peaceful. At rest.

"Oh darling. I don't know what I'll do without you. These twenty two years we've been together have been so wonderful. I promise our baby will be loved and cherished. The kids have been great darling. Looking after the farm and me." She leaned over stroking his cheek, feeling how cold he was. Tears started streaming.

"Oh darling. I wish you were here with me. I wish you would see our baby grow up. Stay with me. Never leave me. Haunt me if you must. Haunt me till my dying day. I need you baby. Haunt the farm, never leave it. It won't be the same without you." She sobbed as she kissed his head.

"I'll always love you John Barton. That will never change. Even if I marry again or find a new man, You'll always have a special place in my heart." She cried as she left the room, knowing it would be the very last time she would see him.

Give me hope in silence

It's easier, it's kinder

Tell me not of heartbreak

It's plagues my soul, plagues my soul

And bury me beside you

I have no hope

In solitude

And the world will follow

To the earth and down below

But I came and I was nothing

And time will give us nothing

So why did you choose to lean on

A man you knew was falling?

John's funeral arrived and the bartons prepared themselves to say goodbye. Moira saw that she was developing a small bump as she got dressed. She put her hand on it as she walked downstairs, she was playing hers and Johns song as she walked outside and saw Adam looking over at the field. It broke her heart.

They got in the car to the crematorium where the funeral would be. They didn't want John on his own in the cemetery. They wanted to set him free.

As everyone sat down, The Bartons were shocked at the turn out and were amazed at how liked their father was. It touched them all. Then Adam saw, to his anger, That Declan Macey had turned up. The two had never got on especially due to the fact that Adam had slept with his wife Ella, while in a relationship with his daughter Mia. He blamed Declan for Johns death and Declan knew this.

Finally, John had arrived. Adam helped Aaron and Andy carry him as soft eerie music played, there wasn't a dry eye as the coffin was laid on the table.

As The Barton kids gave their eulogy to their father, Moira comforted them and was silent. It didn't seem real that she was about to bury her husband but it was happening.

"Goodbye John I love you." She whispered as the funeral ended.

At the woolpack, the solemness was to much for Adam to bear and he started to lash out at everyone and Moira couldn't do anything to stop him. The grief suddenly overpowered her and she felt dizzy and faint. The room started to spin and suddenly She passed out...

When Moira woke up, she was lying in bed with her kids all around her. They were very worried about her and wanted to stay with her.

"You alright mum?" Holly asked and Moira looked around before nodding,

"What happened?" Moira asked. Adam sat on the bed,

"You passed out mum. We took you home. Jimmy and Bob helped us. You gave us such a scare."

Moira sighed and lay back while the kids went downstairs. It was clear that the Bartons would never be the same without the charismatic, handsome dark haired farmer but they would pull together and help each other. And they vowed that the unborn baby would be looked after and cherished just like John would have wanted.

 **Hope you loved the chapter. So do you think The Bartons will cope without John? Do you think John will literally haunt Moira for the rest of her life?**

 **Next time**

 **Months pass and Moira gives birth in the most dramatic way possible xxx**


	5. Chapter 5

**Heres the latest chapter for you guys, Moira gives birth in this chapter and Ive provided a bit of comedic relief to this otherwise dark tale Enjoy xxx**

Months had past since Johns tragic death and it had been a difficult pregnancy for Moira. She was sick constantly, she had pain when she walked and she will ill quite often. Hannah and Holly now lived in London and Adam was supporting his mother the best way he could, it was clear Moira was still grieving from losing John and the fact that she was pregnant made it ten times worse.

Moira took a walk into the village one Friday morning while Adam was working, feeling bored being stuck at home. The village always brought her comfort and she just fancied a walk around, as she walked to the shops, Chas ran up to her,

"Hiya Maws, aww arent you developing well!" she remarked as she rubbed Moiras large baby bump. Moira smiled,

"Only a few more weeks and Ill be saying hello.Never thought id be a mum again." Moira said sadly as she put a hand protectively to her bump. Chas smiled at her.

"aww once the baby is here, youll be over the moon even if John isnt here anymore. He'll be proud of you, you know. How you've coped with losing him and the baby."

Moira smiled then and walked on, feeling like she had all the support in the world.

Weeks went by and the due date was fast approaching and Moira couldnt contain her excitement about seeing her newborn baby. She also couldnt wait for the pregnancy to end as it had been a tough one.

One October Evening, Moira was in the woolpack sitting at a table with Vanessa and Katie when she started to feel a twinge in her stomach.

"you ok Moira?" Katie asked, looking concerned. Moira nodded then felt another sharp twinge before feeling a gush of water leak from her, leaving a huge puddle in its wake.

"Oh my god, my waters are broke!" Moira cried as Katie and Vanessa helped her up, shouting for someone to call an ambulance but just as they were about to leaveleave, Moira suddenly dropped to the floor, pain unbearable.

Suddenly Jimmy came over and kneeled down,

"Moira, I dont think this baby is gonna hang on. So make yourself nice and comfy." He said and Nicola looked at him with raised eyebrows.

Pillows were brought over as Moira positioned herself onto the floor. Contraction pains hitting her constantly. Jimmy swallowed as he sat in front of her, he never delivered a baby before. Adam burst in and hugged his mother,

"Its ok mum im here." He whispered as he sat behind her so she could rest against him.

"Im so scared Adam. What if there is something wrong?! something is gonna happen to this baby and its all my fault! Your Dad is not here and its all down to me!" Moira cried as she began to push. Adam held her hands as Jimmy guided her,

"Mum it wasnt your fault. He did what he did out of love for you. Nothing is wrong with the baby I swear." Adam reassured as Moira panted. A crowd gathered as the birth became more intense. Val and Eric who had witnessed the birth of Gennie and Nikhils daughter Molly, were shocked to see another birth taking place.

"Oh God not another one."Eric mumbled but Val rushed over, feeling the euphoria of the previous birth.

"Anything I can do to help?" She asked enthusiastically but Jimmy shook his head,

"No everything is under control and I can see a head!" He auddenly exclaimed and Moira panted once more as another contraction hit her.

"Come on Moira! Your doing fine! One last push!" Jimmy yelled and Moira screamed as she pushed and finally a cry echoed across the room.

"Is it alright?" Moira asked faintly as the baby cried.Adam hugged her closely as Jimmy inspected the baby,

"Hes fine Moira. You have a beautiful baby boy." He said as he wrapped the baby up and passed him to Moira. Moira cried tears of happiness as she held her newborn son. He was beautiful.

"Thank you Jimmy. Ill never forget this." She said softly and Nicola hugged Jimmy.

Just then the police came in and asked for Jimmy and everyone turned to look and wonder what was going on.

A few hours later, Moira was in hospital holding her newborn son in her arms. He was definately a Barton and looked like John. Moira felt the familar tears come and she blinked them back.

"Hope your looking down on your son John, he's just like you." She whispered as she kissed the babies tufty black hair.

Just then a nurse came in,

"You have a visitor Mrs Barton." She said and Moira nodded, she opened the door and Cain stood there,

"Hello Moira. Congratulations." He said and Moira nodded. Then he came over to have a look at the baby,

"Hes a cracker isnt he? You got a name for him?" He asked and Moira nodded again,

"His name is Freddie. Freddie John Barton. I like the name." Moira said and Cain nodded.

"Proper little Barton isnt he?" Cain remarked and Moira smiled.

As she passed Freddie over to Cain, she already had big plans for her baby.

Freddie Barton would live up to the family name.

 **Hope you liked the chapter, Next time Cain and Moira start a relationship and her brother in law arrives in the village.** **please review xxx**


	6. Chapter 6

**hey guys, hope you like the story so far. Things are set to get scary in upcoming chapters so you have been warned. Enjoy xxx**

Months had passed and Freddie was now nearly a year old. Moira had struggled at first to raise him but then as time went by and with the support of friends and family she managed to raise him properly. One thing she didnt expect was starting a relationship with Cain, the same man who had nearly broken up herself and John. He had been ever so good with Freddie and loved him like he was his own. She felt guilty about the way she felt about him but knew she had to move on with her life though she would always love John.

A removal van pulled up outside wyldes farm which was unoccupied and had been for years. Moira and Cain watched from a distance as the van stopped to a halt but when she saw who it was, her eyes widened,

Standing there was a middle aged man with greying brown hair wearing a brown jacket with jeans. Standing with him was two young man good looking and tall. Moira knew who they were straight away.

Walking over to them, she said polietly,

"Hello James."

James Barton was Johns older brother but they hadnt seen each other for many years. In fact James had not long been notified about Johns death which had left him distraught and almost bitter that they didn't say goodbye.

"Hey Aunt Moira." The oldest boy Pete came over and gave his aunt a hug while the youngest Finn smiled and waved as he grabbed a box from the van.

Moira was pleased to see them all but James was quite akward around her. His wife Emma had abandoned the family many years ago and none of the Bartons liked her, John had despised her. James often thought about Emma and his boys often wondered where she was.

Ross unfortunately had turned into a trouble maker who had fallen out with his father and now was making the lives of the villagers difficult much to James emmbarrasment.

Time passed and the Bartons settled in well making friends with the villagers and as Moira and Cains relationship progressed, Adam was happy to be getting a father figure even though he didnt approve at first and even after discovering that James was his real father after a drunken mistake, The bartons remained very close.

One night, James was having a late night walk across the moors, he liked it there as it was peaceful and he could see the whole village from up above. He sat down under a tree and looked straight ahead.

He missed John terribly even though he didnt want to admit it. John had always been the perfect brother in his eyes. Even his own father had favoured him over James. None of the less, James was still grief stricken over his death and what made it more devastating was the fact that he had left behind a little baby boy that he wouldnt know. He was determined to tell Freddie all about John when he got older, he didnt trust Cain at all and believed he would lead Freddie into believing that he was his biological father.

As he headed off to leave, James had a feeling he wasnt alone. He could see at the corner of his eye that there was someone in the distance. He thought it was strange but not unusual. Perhaps Douglas Potts had gone for a late night walk too or Marlon had taken his dog for a walk.

He walked faster and then he had a feeling he was being followed. He could hear footsteps and walked faster before h started running.

"Leave me alone!" He shouted as he ran towards the farm and shut the door behind him.

Pete, who was still awake, looked at his father with raised eyebrows,

"You ok Dad?" He asked and James nodded,

"Yeah son, im fine. My imagination is playing games with me." He responded with a weak smile.

Pete shrugged and went back to bed while James turned the light off and shook all the images away in his head.

He needed to chill out.

Or did he?

 **Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Next time, Cain and Moira get engaged and things get creepy on Butlers farm**


	7. Chapter 7

**another chapter in one** day, **im on a roll hehe Things are gonna get scary on Butlers Farm so youve been**

It was 2014, Freddie was eighteen months old and Cain and Moira were engaged. She never thought this day would come but Cain had worked on her and she was now walking down the aisle with him. For the first time in a long time, she was happy and her little boy was growing up fast.

As Cain was leaving for work, he saw that Freddie was attempting to walk unaided and he smiled and came down to his level,

"Thats it mate. Come on, just a few more steps." He said softly as he held his arms out to him. Freddie got up again and started to slowly walk, stopping every now and again as he felt himself wobbling but at last a few more steps and he made it towards Cain who cheered and picked him up.

"Well done little man! Thats fantastic!" He said cheerfully,

"If only your mummy can see you."

"I did see it." Moira remarked from behind with a huge smile. She kissed Cain and held freddie close to her and cuddled him close.

"You gonna be a page boy for mummy darling?" Moira baby talked to Freddie who smiled sweetly and held onto her jacket, messing with the zipper. Moira smiled at him proudly.

Only a year ago she and Cain had nearly come close to having a child of their own but sadly she miscarried. Moira was channelling her love into the baby she was holding and she couldnt be more happy to have him even if his father had been dead for two years.

The night before the wedding, Adam was cleaning out the barn. He was meeting Victoria in the Woolpack later on and was looking forward to it. He loved Vic and couldn't wait for the day when they would one day get married.

As he continued cleaning the barn, he sensed something wasnt right. It was something about the atmosphere that made him feel suddenly uncomfortable. He shrugged and continued distributing the hay across the barn before letting the cows in. He smiled to himself then and headed back to the cottage to get dressed.

But as he was about to leave, he could hear the barn door creaking. This was unusual. The barn door never creaked and it was making a huge row. Adam was confused but shrugged all the same, making a note to himself to call Andy at some point in the week after the wedding. He went to go fetch the padlock from the kitchen but as he did, the barn door suddenly slammed shut causing a louf bang and startling the cows and sheep. Adam slowly turned around and what he saw caused him to nearly cry out.

Sprawled on the barn door in what looked like blood was the words:

STAY AWAY FROM MOIRA AND THIS FARM, CAIN!

Adam ran towards the woolpack to alert his mother about what he saw, his heart racing.

Moira was having a drink with Lisa, Vanessa and Katie when Adam burst in, James looked up as well.

"Mum, you need to get back to the farm, your not gonna believe what ive just seen!" He shouted and they rushed towards Butlers. Adam lead Moira to the barn followed by James and Pete who had followed also.

Adam pointed at the barn door but to his surprise and horror, he saw there was nothing on the door and that the barn was open.

" Your not getting enough sleep, its all in your head love. Theres nothing there!" Moira exclaimed.

"I swear Mum, there was something there." Adam protested then Cain came and put his arm round him,

"Get some sleep mate, weve got an important day tommorow and make sure you dont wake Freddie." Cain said and Adam, realising he wasnt being believed headed inside. As everyone headed inside, James stayed back and began to wonder.

On the morning of the wedding, Moira was getting Freddie dressed in a pale blue page boy outfit which made him look so adorable that he almost looked like a doll. Moira smiled at him as Adam came in.

"There you are Mate. Come on lets leave mummy in peace." He said, holding out a hand and allowing Freddie to take it. Moira proudly watched as Freddie walked with the aide of his older brother then grabbing her red wedding dress, she began to get changed.

As Moira and Cain made their vows, Adam watched Freddie closely as he was picked up by James who had doted on his little nephew since he arrived in the village. Adam saw alot of John in the little boy and it made him feel sad knowing John wasnt around anymore. But he knew that John wouldve been proud of his little boy and knew that Freddie would be well taken care off.

Moira Barton became Moira Dingle and for a while the marriage would be happy despite some twists and turns along the way such as Emma coming back and the paternity of Moses Dingle who would be born a year later as Charity Dingle, Cains ex and Debbies mother, had fallen pregnant before she got put in prison. It later transpired that Ross was the father. Despite this, it would be happy marriage.

However things began to go wrong.

And the paranormal activity would get more sinister.

 **Hope you like it next chapter will be more scary as more paranormal activity takes place**


	8. Chapter 8

2016 arrived quickly and Moira and Cains marriage was progressing and Freddie, who was now nearly four, was baring a striking resemblance to John. He was a beautiful little boy and he also was a polite child, protected by his family and enjoying his life. No one would realise that the happiness was gonna be cut short.

Half way through the year, Moira was taking Freddie to nursery. Diane walked over and smiled at Freddie,

"Awww Look at this young lad. Hes definitely a Barton. John would be proud of him." She said fondly as Freddie smiled up at her, Moira smiled sadly at him, wishing that he would have known his father but she knew that he had a good father figure in cain.

"He still doesn't know anything about him. I keep going to tell him but I don't think he'll understand." Moira said softly as she kept a firm grip on her sons hand. Diane nodded then Priya and Rakesh came over, Priya was carrying her daughter Amba while Rakesh was watching Vanessa pushing his grandson Johnny, named after Freddies father and felt a twinge of sadness over his past actions, he still hadn't heard from Kiran, Johnnys father and his son.

Behind Priya was her brothers Nikhils daughter Molly, she had lost her mother Gennie a year after she was born and she had been living with Nikhil in Canada but made occasional visits. She was a pretty child with dark hair and Freddie went over to her. At first Mollie tensed up, feeling shy,

"Mollie this is Freddie. Hes not gonna hurt you, he wants to play with you." Priya said, "And you both have the same birthday."

Mollie smiled at Freddie and took his hand, they ran off to the playground while the adults watched. The two children also shared a birthday with Debbie Dingle's son Jack and when he arrived fifteen minutes later, they played with him, beginning a lifelong friendship.

Later that afternoon, Moira picked up Freddie from Nursery and as they were heading home, a voice called out,

"Hello Mum."

She turned around and saw, to her amazement, her eldest child Holly. Holly looked different, more classy with blonde hair, She walked over slowly and she smiled at Freddie holding her arms out,

"Freddie! Come give me an hug!" She called out and Freddie ran to her as she lifted him up into a hug. Moira smiled at them and headed to see her daughter.

"its good to see you darling." She said honestly and cuddled her. Cain saw the two women unite and felt happy and also slightly suspicious. This had been the first time Holly had stepped foot in Emmerdale since she had left four years earlier and the fact that she had turned up unannounced spoke volumes for him giving her history.

Weeks passed and it was soon clear why Holly had come home; she was back on the drugs. The man she had claimed was her boyfriend was actually her dealer and she owed him money which Moira paid off. Then Holly claimed that she was clean but in reality, she wasn't. She was secretly taking drugs behind Moira's back and was subsequently putting Freddie and Cain's son Kyle at risk of exposure.

All the time Freddie's developing friendship with Molly and Jack continued to grow and he seemed to like Ross's son Moses and always had a smile every time he saw him. Emma however wasn't keen on having Freddie around and often tried to take Moses far from him which annoyed James. James was fond of Freddie and often introduced him to the animals which Freddie liked.

Things finally came to a head in September. Cain, who had kissed Charity after an argument with Moira, ended up sleeping with her, hurting Moira in the process. Moira filed for divorce as a result and her relationship with Adam strained after he disowned Holly for putting Victoria in danger. Freddie didn't understand what was happening, one minute the family was happy and thriving and then they were torn apart.

Towards the end of September, Holly began a romance with Jai, Molly's uncle and was starting to sort her life out, she had binned the drugs and took a course in photography at college, often taking pictures of Freddie. Freddie adored Holly and she loved him. Sadly their bond wouldn't last.

One afternoon, Holly had headed upstairs after a heartwarming chat with Moira. Freddie was playing on the floor with his toys, not once had he asked after Cain, deciding he didn't like him anymore for leaving his mummy. At one point he had kicked Charity in the leg, causing Ross to say angrily,

"You kick Charity again and you wont see Moses again!"

Moira had been so angry that Ross had said that to a three year old child and told him to keep away from Freddie who was crying but Holly cheered him up by saying that she would buy him sweets.

Freddie headed upstairs to see Holly, he had drawn her a picture of a dog and wanted to give it to her. He saw that the door was open and he walked in hoping to see her listening to music or watching the television.

She wasn't.

She was lying in bed, the blanket was covering her up and Freddie walked over with the picture.

"Holly? Me draw you picture. Doggy. Holly? Holly?" He called out but she didn't answer him. He headed downstairs and went to Moira,

"Mummy, Holly sleeping." He said and he sat down and played with the toys while Moira headed upstairs.

Moira checked on Holly and even felt her pulse, there was nothing.

Holly was dead. She had taken a drug overdose.

Moira's heart tore in two as she called Adam to inform him, soon Chas and Diane were also at the house comforting a sobbing Moira, Vanessa saw Freddie sitting on the floor and went up to him,

"Come on sweetheart were going to Auntie Diane's."

Freddie followed Vanessa wondering what was going on and why his mother was crying.

Later that night, Moira sat on the spare bed that Freddie was sleeping on and stroked his head. She was saddened that he had a short time with his oldest sister and felt that she had let him down. She sat on the floor,

"Oh Holly. I'm so sorry I couldn't save you this time, Your dad will be waiting for you at the end of the line." She repeated her earlier words as she sat up and headed out.

She headed back to Butlers farm and went to the barn, looking at the moonlight and sitting on the straw.

"Oh John why did you have to die? Maybe Holly would still be here. You were much stronger than me. Its my fault that you died and never saw our son and now I caused Holly to die because I wasn't hard on her." She sobbed as she continued looking up at the sky.

Suddenly she felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around her waist and she was stunned, the smell of aftershave was lingering and Moira turned around but there was nobody behind her. A huge gust of wind blew against the gates causing them to bang loudly and the barn door swung open. Moira was shocked and headed back to the woolpack.

Hollys funeral took place soon after and Freddie was looked after by Diane as Moira felt he was too young to understand what was going on but she was going to explain about John and Holly to Freddie in the best way that she could after what Diane had said to her the other day.

"Freddie needs to know the truth."

Later that evening, Moira sat in the kitchen as Adam brought Freddie into the kitchen,

"Mummy needs to tell you something mate. Come sit down." Adam said softly as Freddie sat at the table. Moira sighed heavily and took a deep breath and sat down,

"Darling theres something I need to try and explain to you something. Its not gonna be easy and I will do my very best darling. Your real dad got hurt before you was born, the doctors couldn't fix his cuts or give him medicine to make him better, your daddy is in heaven with your sister Holly. They are always with you darling and are looking down on you and making sure your safe, they will be your guardian angels forever." Moiras voice broke and Adam cuddled her and took Freddie to bed.

After Freddie had gone to sleep, Adam sat down and held Moira's hand.

"Listen Mum, you need time to get your head clear, I know that your drinking as well. If you want me and Victoria will look after Freddie for a while." Adam suggested and Moira took a deep breath,

"I think its for the best." She said softly.

Freddie went to stay with Victoria and Adam for the remainder of the year in which time his uncle James was killed by his aunt Emma and Moira's drinking escalated which resulted in a fling with Pete and Cain but by the end of the year Moira was clean and Freddie moved back home with her.

2017 was an eventful year. Not only did Cain start a relationship with Harriet Finch, the vicar but Moira gave birth to a shock baby boy whom she named Isaac, Cain was the father but he expressed no interest in the infant and Moira developed post natal depression. Emma's murderous secret was revealed and in an attempt to hide it she attacked her youngest son Finn and he died as a result of his wounds. Racked with guilt, Emma took her own life by throwing herself of the viaduct. Freddie still remained devoted on by his family and he continued to adore his mother.

All the time however, the paranormal activity continued and wouldn't stop. And as the years went on, it escalated further.

Freddie's life would remain eventful over the next few years.


	9. Chapter 9

Seven years had passed since Holly's tragic death and so much had happened in the years that had followed. Moira was now a single woman hanging onto the memory of her beloved John but still keeping Butlers Farm under working order, Isaac was now six years old and like all the Dingle's he was cheeky and mischievous but already showed signs of being fiercely loyal to his family. Freddie was now eleven and was an intelligent and kind hearted boy who wanted to succeed in life. He was John all over, a hard worker through and through and Moira was proud of him. She was now a grandmother; her younger daughter Hannah had got together with Nikhil three years after Holly's death, they married four years earlier with Freddie and Isaac as pageboys and she now had a son named Lucas and was pregnant once more. She knew that Nikhil still missed Gennie but they had a happy marriage and she was a devoted step mother to Mollie who had become a very good friend of Freddie. Adam no longer lived in Emmerdale, his marriage to Victoria was over and he lived in London, he visited occasionally and Moira missed him a lot. She now had Pete and Ross helping on the farm, Ross was now married to Debbie and they had two kids, Lily and Harry.

Freddie was coming home from school with Mollie and Jack, Sarah was supposed to meet them by the bus stop but she didn't turn up, instead she had snuck off to meet her boyfriend from college, she was going to university soon and Jack was gonna miss her. The trio sat on a gate and looked out the village, they saw Diane chasing away some youth on bikes, they saw Aaron and Robert with their adopted twins, Luke and Dylan, they could see April Windsor arguing with Marlon over the length of her skirt and they saw Charity arguing with Rhona about her car.

"The village of madness that's what it is." Mollie mumbled as she ate her crisps, tossing her dark hair out of her face, Jack saw Debbie and hid behind Freddie who grinned and laughed.

"Mummy's boy." He joked and they began play fighting then Freddie stood up.

He saw Cain with his wife Harriet. He liked her in a way, she seemed a really nice lady but he couldn't warm to her. Harriet had become pregnant only three months after Isaac's birth and she and Cain had married shortly after the birth of their daughter, Chloe. Chloe was five years old and was always holding her mothers hand, Isaac often felt out when she was around, it was as if he wasn't a part of the family. Cain caught Freddie's eye and Freddie glared at him, he would never forgive him for his treatment of his mother and the fact that he hadn't helped when she needed help. Nonetheless he had a good relationship with Isaac and it didn't bother him that they had different fathers and that he sometimes felt envious of the fact that he knew his father but he had never had the chance to make memories of John. Isaac came over to him then and Freddie put his arm around him,

"Take no notice mate. Lets go home and get some food down our necks." he remarked as they headed home.

The next day Freddie was playing in the barn while Isaac was in his room watching cartoons. Freddie liked the barn, a good hiding place in the past, he loved it. As he was playing, Harriet came over to him, she was hoping that Isaac would want to play with Chloe.

"Hello Freddie." She called out and Freddie stopped playing and looked at her,

"Hello Harriet, Isaac's upstairs." He said and Chloe appeared behind her, holding her hand. She smiled sweetly at Freddie who smiled back,

"Look Mummy, animals." She said to Harriet and Harriet smiled at her,

"Yes darling their animals. Look a sheep." Harriet showed Chloe the animals while Freddie went back to the house and went in his room.

He lay on his bed. He wished he knew John, he didn't even know what he looked like. He knew his personality as Moira told him often enough. Yet he couldn't imagine his face, how he acted, how he spoke, how he did day to day tasks. It seemed as if he had vanished of the face of the earth. He knew that his mother kept a box under her bed and he had once tried to take it away but she had stopped him saying that he wouldn't understand right now and that he needed to wait till he was older.

"Hope your looking down on me dad. From Heaven. With Holly." He spoke out loud before he began to cry.


	10. Chapter 10

Five years passed and Freddie had grown into a handsome young man, he was sixteen now and so much had happened. Hannah had now transitioned into a man and went by the name of Matty and even though both Freddie and Moira were dismissive at first, they came round and Matty was still a brilliant parent to his children whom Freddie adored. He also had a good relationship with Jack and it was clear they were bosom buddies but Freddie barely saw Mollie now as she was living with her father in Canada where Matty's eldest lived. Matty had another daughter who was named Holly and she lived at Butlers with Moira Matty, Isaac and Freddie, Holly was everything like her late auntie; she was funny, artistic and kind and she was only a small child. Freddie also developed a love for music and got an expensive guitar of his mum for his sixteenth while Matty taught him different songs. Moira saw alot of John in Freddie and was still quite overprotective of him.

Freddie headed out with Jack to the Wool pack, where Aaron and Roberts adoptive daughter Destiny was waiting. She was the same age as Freddie and Jack but was taller and very pretty, Jack was enamored with her.

"Put your eyes back in your head mate." Freddie teased as they walked in, earning a jab from Jack in the process. Debbie was sitting in the woolpack with Sarah and they rolled their eyes as Jack attempted to flirt with Destiny. Matty came in with Holly and sat himself at the bar, he smiled at Freddie and called him over. Matty was very protective of Freddie and often told Freddie stories about John, like Freddie, Matty looked like John and they both knew it.

"Where's Holly?"

"With Mum, Isaac is staying with Cain and Harriet. He seems to bond with Chloe doesn't he?"

"Yeah I know."

Matty watched his little brother as he drank his coke,

"You know, Im very surprised that Isaac hasn't befriended Sebastian?"

Freddie nodded and sighed,

"They dont like each other. Dont forget Isaac pushed Seb over and broke his arm last year if you remember?"

"Yeah, Cain and Aaron had a right how do you do over that."

"Matty, can I ask you something?"

"Off course, what is it?"

Freddie took a deep breath as he looked at Matty,

"Do you think Mum thinks about Dad sometimes?"

"Im sure she does mate in fact I know she does, why do you think that picture of him and her dressed in eights gear sits on the end table still?"

Freddie smiled at him and stood up,

"Im gonna get Jack, we'll go to David's shop and see if Amba is in. If not Ill come back, Jack's going to see his dad tomorrow and he wont be back till half term holiday ends."

Freddie walked out, mentions of his dad always got to him but yet there was still so much he didn't know.

As Freddie browsed in the shop, He saw Moses Dingle luring about with his step brother Johnny Wood field. Their mothers were married to each other and lived quite a good life in spite of their pasts. Freddie didnt like Charity due to her past treatment of Moira and the fact that she sometimes could say awful things but he liked Vanessa and thought she was funny. Moses and Johnny spotted Freddie and they walked over to him,

"Hello Fred, how are you?"

Freddie smiled at Johnny,

"I'm alright thanks, haven't seen you much Moses."

Moses rolled his eyes, he looked exactly Charity it was hard to digest that they were related. Moses was his cousin Ross's son as were Debbie's two younger children so Moses and Freddie were related somehow. Moses and Freddie had a love hate relationship right back from when they were children, Moses was three years younger than Freddie at thirteen.

"I've been staying with me dad actually not that it was any good mind. All he did was moan all the time."

"Oh right well Im glad your back mate. Oh Congratulations Johnny on getting that art award, you deserved it."

Johnny smiled at him but then Moses grabbed something from the fridge and scowled at Freddie,

"Tell anyone and Ill tell everyone that you hit me." Moses sneered as he grabbed Johnny and Ran out, April Windsor who was an employee at the shop shouted out,

"Oi what are you doing? Come here!"

Freddie sighed heavily and rolled his eyes as he grabbed his bag, bought his stuff and headed back out to see Jack.

When Freddie got home later that night, he picked up his guitar and began singing a song he had written over the summer;

Such a lonely road

A place where there's misery and darkness

Where are you, I need you

I wish you were here with me

Im dying, Im crying

Just help me, come back to me

Oh you are my guiding light

a guarding angel in disguise

Oh you are my saviour

Oh where are you, I need you

Please come back to me

Please Please Please

I need you here

Freddie rubbed his eyes and sunk his head into the guitar crying silent tears.


End file.
